Today's Horoscope
All signs:
Today you will most likely be dismissive towards someone. We tend to casually toss around advice, and we don't really think about what our words mean to the people we say them to. It's a fact of life, and most of the time we don't mean to, but we do it without thinking.
Empathy is hard work, but it is one of the single most important traits you can possess. Empathy is not just feeling bad for a moment when you read about a child succumbing to illness or getting bummed out for a minute watching that Sarah McLachlan animal abuse commercial on TV late at night.
It means putting yourself in someone else's position and truly understanding what they are feeling. It means realizing that other people don't just exist when you interact with them. They don't just go into a closet and into shut down mode like a robot, they continue to suffer and struggle even when you can't see them. You would be surprised how many of us don't realize that simple truth. Out of sight, out of mind is not an attitude you should aspire to.
For instance, if you know someone suffering from some form of mental health issue, don't just tell them to cheer up, or think positive, or get over it, or go get some help. Don't you think they would just do that if they could? The first three examples are just shitty things to say to someone struggling with an illness. You wouldn't tell someone with cancer to just cheer up or get over it, would you?
As far as telling them to go get help, well… you most likely mean well, but that's where empathy really comes in. For most people it's not as easy as all that. Some are suffering with a disease that tells them not to get help. They are frightened by how they feel, or the thought of having to actually verbalize their feelings to anyone, let alone a complete stranger.
I know so many people that want to get help, but they can't afford it, and their insurance doesn't cover it, if they even have insurance in the first place. Then there's the stigma society places on mental health, even in this day and age. It can stifle you and make you feel alone and like a freak, just because you have an illness people can't relate to. Again, empathy would help you with that.
Then, if in this perfect world scenario you do go get help in the form of therapy you end up reliving the most painful parts of your life over and over again in an attempt to get past them.
Or perhaps the answer is to just get some meds. Well, if you've ever seen what that entails sometimes you wouldn't be so flippant. It takes a lot of trial and error to get the doses and types of meds right, and all that time is spent having horrible reactions and mood swings caused by different toxic chemicals fucking with your brain chemistry, on top of the natural chemicals fucking with your brain chemistry before a doctor started experimenting with pharmaceuticals.
Then, if you're lucky you will find a regimen of drugs that help you with your main problem but in most cases cause side effects that make you wonder if the cure is better than the disease.
And even as you read this, I bet some of you are thinking that I'm coddling the people I'm talking about. You think it's bullshit that you have to walk on eggshells around someone when no one promised them that life was fair. No one gave you any breaks, you've had to deal with tough things in your life too, and no one cared about your problems.
I understand that too. Life and other people can be really frustrating. Sometimes it does feel like we get the shitty end of the stick. That's because in a way, we all do. Nothing is ever going to be perfect, very little in life is going to be easy, and when you solve one problem, another is sitting in wait to take its place. We feel like no one cares about our stuff, and no one appreciates how hard we try, and everyone else is getting a free ride and everything handed to them on a silver platter.
And how does that make you feel? Angry, and like no one even cares? Well, that's how it feels to be on the other end when no one has empathy for you. So why would you do it to someone else? If you spend some time everyday working on your empathy and trying to understand others you probably wouldn't be so quick to judge.
I'm lucky in that I don't suffer from any debilitating mental issues. I don't completely understand exactly how it feels or sometimes even why people that do are offended or hurt by my attitude at times. I just know that they are, and that's enough of a reason to try to change my behavior. You don't have to understand why it hurts someone completely to have empathy for them. You just have to know that it does make them feel like shit and stop doing it. That's all it takes. Have enough empathy to see that you're hurting someone, and stop hurting them. You would be surprised at how many sociopaths are running around these days not realizing the damage they cause. To others and to themselves.
The stars sympathize. They see us as individuals and understand our unique personal struggles. They have a soft spot for people struggling with their own minds. Through the ages they try to speak to them and try to bring them some comfort. So if you ever come across someone talking to the stars and think that they are mad, realize that it might just be that they have no one to talk to that understands them as well as the night sky.
Capricorn:
Did you realize that you can rearrange the letters in your sign to read “I crap corn”? Use that on your résumé.
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