1/2/19

Today’s Horoscope

Starting off the new year is a good time to clean out your life. We accumulate a lot in the course of daily living, physically and emotionally.
Clean out your stuff. We tend to hold onto things longer than we should. We attach memories to objects, and while that’s not necessarily a bad thing, too much of it can bog you down. We get new things, and rather than get rid of the old, we simply relegate it to a closet or an out of the way spot, where they all pile up. Things that matter should earn that title by actually mattering, not just because they mattered once a long time ago.
Clean out your mind. Examine yourself and your actions and feelings every chance you get. See if there are things you are holding onto that you would be better off resolving or simply walking away from. Many times we hold onto trauma long after it’s over. We can’t get past what happened because we can’t make sense of it, and we live in the shadow of fear that it could happen again. Often people who have unresolved trauma wind up putting themselves in positions to have it happen again. That might be some subconscious attempt to try to understand it or conquer it, but it is dangerous and unhealthy. We hold on to the familiar, whether it is good or bad, simply because we know it so well.
Figure out which of your thought processes are holding you back, creating fear and uncertainty and insecurity. That doesn’t just apply to traumatic memories. Many of the things we do are a distraction from what we are really feeling or what we should really be doing. List the things you would really like to do, and then find a way to do them. Live consciously and with purpose, don’t just drift along at the whims of your half-formed impulses and emotions.
Clean out the people you know. You sometimes need to reevaluate and move on from some of the people in your life the same way you clean out your friend list on social media. We often end up getting to know a lot of people simply because of proximity or happenstance. People in your neighborhood, people you went to school with, people you end up working with, people who go to the same bar you did when you were younger. Sure, some of them can become good and lifelong friends, but many are people you find that you don’t really have much in common with. Social obligation makes you feel like you are supposed to honor that relationship like it is deep and important, when all some of these people are is acquaintances, not someone that you share a real bond with.
Then there people who are friends, but maybe they shouldn’t be. They might be selfish, or self destructive, or just outright jerks. We all have people in our lives who strain our patience and goodwill. They can be petty or insulting, abusive and insensitive. They are still in your life even though they don’t bring much to it. In fact, some of them are manipulating and using you, or taking their own issues out on you. If it’s a rare and occasional thing, then maybe stick with them, but if it’s a pattern or day to day, get rid of them. At least keep them at arms length and don’t give them anything you can’t afford to lose.
Any relationship involves give and take, and support, sacrifice, understanding and kindness. If you are only giving and not getting any of that back, then why are you there? We tend to keep people in our lives who make us miserable, and we only see some idealized version we hope they can attain, but they never will. Don’t make excuses, for you or for the people in your life who are supposed to care about you, and after they are gone, don’t waste your life hoping they will come back.
The stars think with the new year, you should be moving forward. It is hard to do that dragging a lot of junk behind you that is only weighing you down.